PKS1226+023 The Red-Shifted Quasar PKS1226+023, the red-shifted quasar Had a very shiny jet And if you ever saw it, It's as shiny as they get. Some of the other quasars Had no jets that you could see They weren't about to try to Outrun light's velocity. Then one Lyman alpha cloud Intervened to say PKS1226+023 with your jet so bright Please excite me with your light Then all astronomers loved it And they shouted out with glee: PKS1226+023, the red-shifted quasar You constrain cosmology! Detailed Balance (sung to "Deck the Halls") Detailed balance It's just micro- scopic time reversal Symmetry. Put some Boltzmann Factors in there Then go on and add Fugacity. Milne Relation, And equation Of Saha Saha Sa- ha Saha. Detailed balance It's just micro- scopic time reversal Symmetry. Walking in a Thin Accretion Disk B-fields form, they're collecting. Kinda warm! reconnecting Relax and we'll go Along with the flow Walkin' in a thin accretion disk. It's insane at the midplane, So they say: Frank, King and Raine. At z equals naught, There's all that we've sought. Walkin' in a thin accretion disk. Look at the accretion column roamin' Smashing on the star with lots of speed. X-rays will come off and we'll say whoah, man! That's the kind of suntan we don't need. What was that? 'Twas a shockwave We survived, ar-en't we brave The problem is moot Because of our suit Walkin' in a thin accretion disk Oh my god, look at that though. Neutron star's now a black hole We're gonna be hair Expelled in a flare Walkin' in a thin accretion disk. Opacity Opacity, opacity! How lovely are thy units. Opacity, opacity! Beloved by thy students. Ross'land mean opacities Bring radiation to its knees. Opacity, opacity, Much pleasure doth thou bring me! Opacity, opacity! Extinction pe-er density. Opacity, opacity! Naught to do with fugacity. Thomson does not have a "p" Although it boasts simplicity. Opacity, opacity! Much pleasure doth thou bring me! Opacity, opacity! The source of countless lumens. Opacity, opacity, You will outlive us humans!